Sunday, December 6, 2009

Picture sparks fresh concerns as "Blair can't even take a dump without being strangely self-conscious".

There are fresh concerns over the mental health of Tony Blair following the release of a picture of the former British Prime Minister sitting on a toilet. The picture was taken during a break from the recent negotiations in Brussels over the post of President of the European Council - a post which Blair ultimately lost to Belgian PM Herman Van Rompuy.

The person who took the picture has decided to remain anonymous, but insists that he took the photograph out of a concern for Mr Blair's mental state: "I went to the bathroom and heard a person apparently talking to themselves in one of the cabins," said the source "It was very strange. He was mumbling things like 'This will be a people's know...want you all know...understand...I cannot appease this turd any will stand turd to turd with all the turds and be a great turd...history will judge.' So I decided to force the door open to see what was going on and ended up taking a picture of Tony Blair on the toilet. And the weirdest thing was, that he was reading all of these things from a piece of paper, like he couldn't even take a s*#t anymore without convincing himself of his own historical greatness. The guy is clearly in denial."

The source for the photograph also added that he hopes the picture's publication will help rather than harm Blair "I mean, if this guy is self-conscious even while taking a dump in private, then maybe he needs some help. I hope my picture helps to move this process forward."

Meanwhile, Palestinians have been continuing their month-long celebrations following the failure of Mr Blair to win the EU presidency. "That means he will remain as a Middle-East peace envoy!" said one Palestinian in Ramallah "And this brings great joy and hope to all of us. He really is the man to get things done!"

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